Tullian Tchividjian, the grandson of famed evangelist Billy Graham, has expressed his regret for being involved in an adultery scandal two years ago that led to his separation from his wife.
In a recent blog post, Tchividjian warned his readers he is "way worse than anyone knows" regardless of what bad things they may have heard about him.
"In fact, I am certain that if all my sins (thoughts, words, and deeds) over the last four decades were broadcast universally, the only person who would still love me is Jesus (and sometimes in my darkest moments of doubt and despair, I have wondered whether even he would)," he said.
He admitted that he "selfishly wrecked" his own life and the lives of many others by being involved in an adultery scandal.
"The consequences of my sins are omnipresent. There isn't a day that goes by when I am not reminded, in some way, of what I've done and the damage I've caused," he continued.
Tchividjian resigned from his position as a pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in 2015 after admitting that he was involved in an affair. He was also fired from Willow Creek Church after church officials found out about an undisclosed affair that he had revealed to close allies at Coral Ridge.
In his blog post, the former pastor recounted a time when he was in Barnes & Noble where he found a book by a young Christian author whom he never met face-to-face. He recalled that the author had asked him to write an endorsement of the new book because of the value that it would bring to his work.
Tchividjian said that he agreed to do it, but he was overcome with grief when he saw his name on the back of the author's book years later.
"There it was, my name, sticking out like a discrediting blemish on his hard work. I felt sick," the former pastor said, adding that the moment reminded him of the "far reaching effects" of his sin and how so many people he's never even met "were hurt" by him.
Throughout most of his blog post, Tchividjian expressed regret for his past mistakes and noted that there are other people who are just like him who live with guilt and shame for what they have done or failed to do.
The former pastor offered some hope for others who find themselves in a similar situation as him by inviting them to turn to Jesus with him.